Posted in Life Mental Health

Change | tacos | Autumn | tiredness

Change | tacos | Autumn | tiredness Posted on 25/09/20162 Comments
Ahoy, hello! My name is Jenny. I am a thirty-something human female from Manchester in the north of England. I enjoy rainy days and sad songs, custard donuts and salt & pepper chips and beer, lentil dhal and fried okra, X-Files and Twin Peaks, fierce fat heroines and mental health advocates, dogs and cats and otters and a very special beirdo. To paraphrase Sylvia Plath: "I blog because there is a voice within me that insists on writing lots of ridiculous chuff".

This’ll be a jumble non-post, my blog chums, because my brain is well and truly jumbled lately. C kept me up to speed with the seasons the other day, letting me know the Autumn equinox had been and gone. It’s still been pretty bright and warm here in Manchester though and I’m ready for some chilly mornings, darker nights and gloomy weather in general. This is my reverse S.A.D. in full swing, and these are some old Autumnal photos I dug out of my collection.

Smithills Hall, January 2010
Smithills Hall, January 2010

I started my new job last week; I’m back in higher education, working in the central quality and enhancement team for a nearby University. It was freshers’ week and a bit hectic. Fresh off a week or so of frantically finishing up six thousand words of essay-catch-up for my part time degree, as well as Training The New Person in the job I left, I went into the new role already feeling a little frazzled and the first week thoroughly defeated me. C also attended induction at the University of Manchester for his MSc programme and so we’ve been in a bit of a collective daze, I think.

Somerset, November 2012
Somerset, November 2012

I’ve been easing back into the second full year of my distance learning Masters programme and was dreading discussing the requisite thirty hours of volunteering/work experience I was supposed to try and cram into my routine, as the basis for an Applied Anthrozoology module I’ll complete this semester. My feeble/fatigued condition, exacerbated at the time I think by also volunteering at a local donkey sanctuary, is what led to my break from study last year, and I’m desperately trying to avoid a repeat of my loss of academic (and overall) stamina. The programme leader was tremendously understanding and we discussed some ways I can still complete the module successfully. While my on/off fatigue continues to be investigated it’s a big relief to know I can still engage properly with my degree. At the moment I’m enjoying readings by Jonathan Balcombe, vegan scholar extraordinaire, and author of Pleasurable Kingdom.

C and I helped our lovely friend Michelle celebrate her recent wedding last night. I took along a bottle of champagne, gifted to me by my most recent ex-co-workers (much to my surprise) and intended to quaff a glass or two of fizz and get to bed at an unreasonably early hour. Sometimes my sub-conscious takes over, my brain forgets that I’m 35 now and I get tired All The Time. I drank fizz and fizz and fizz and fizz and fizz. I can only imagine that I took the opportunity to fully cleanse my busy busy brain with plenty of prosecco. I woke up in quite some pain this morning, and C was an absolute champ and brought restorative liquids and foods and medicines to my bedside.

After meeting my Ma for Sunday lunch today, I pootled on home to inhale some black bean tacos and spoon with my pooch, all by way of a satisfactory amount of housework.



These tortillas are made with blue corn which is kind of wow!

C is/was in London today, visiting his sister and catching a gig she’s playing. I was planning to try and cram a couple more journal articles into my brain tonight, but my brain is crying out for a little rest before it’s back to work tomorrow. So I’m going to get into my jammies, make a cup of decaf tea and do some Not School Reading. It’s kind of hard to do working and studying and grown-up-being and all that stuff, all at the same time, especially when feeling all three kinds of tired* simultaneously.


How was your weekend, my blog friends? I sure hope you had a good one.

*My three kinds of tired: (1) is the yawny/not enough sleep tired; (2) is the physical ‘I did too much exercise yesterday’ tired; (3) is the deep-down brain and bone tired you feel when you haven’t stopped DOING for days or weeks and all your senses are over-stimulated and over-used and you really need to leave life behind for a little while and perhaps lie down on the pine needle carpet of a quiet forest and think about nothing whatsoever.

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  1. I hope your energy recovers as you find a groove in your new schedule. Thanks for the recc on Jonathan Balcombe, looking into his work I’m sheepish I’d never heard of him! And I caught a BBC link on your page about horses ability to communicate with us, though I haven’t read it yet I’m looking forward to seeing research proving what us horse peeps already witness. Also, great use of the word ‘Flibble’ 🙂

    1. Thank you! I am due some blood test results soon so I’m rather hoping for some definite diagnosis or other. The horse link is really interesting from an anthrozoological perspective because it wasn’t just about them communicating, but about expressing a preference and giving them some autonomy in a choice (about whether or not to wear a coat!) Balcombe’s writing is lovely and I’m working my way through ‘Pleasurable Kingdom’ at the moment. He’s just released a new book about fish too, I think. Ahhhhhh yes, FLIBBLE! Thank you! I guess it seemed entirely appropriate at the time 😀

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